Hey!

2008-12-13T12:33:00.000-08:00

Hey! I've started my 'your story', click here to visit it. All will be explained WHEN, not if, you visit it. Also if your looking for witty quotes, just scroll down.

lol

2008-07-09T12:49:00.000-07:00

I came across this picture whilst surfing the net, I think its quite funny. Hope you do to. Incase you didn't know, platoon is a film, just type it in on google images and you'll see what I mean.

Hi people!

2008-06-26T12:22:00.000-07:00

Hi people, I've been trying not to kill myself over the fact its been raining for almost a week.... AGAIN ¬_¬ I've decided to start making a V-Blog, for those of you who don't know its a -Video Blog- my youtube account is Shepanator. I might be making it with a friend, don't know yet ;) I'm going to be using a putty character, not just my webcam, maybe the first of kind on youtube. Well... probably not. I'm going to be using a nifty device called a digital blue, specificly designed to make animations, not graphic animations. Anyways, see you again. I bet Jacob is the only person the read this -- EVER --

Tip of the day!

2008-06-18T09:29:00.000-07:00

Witty quotes
______________________________________________________________

Old people are like slinkys, You can't help but laugh when they tumble down the stairs.

______________________________________________________________

How to make a cat go woof? cover it in petrol & use a match.

______________________________________________________________

Woman was god's second mistake.

______________________________________________________________

I haven'y failed! I've just found 10,000 ways it won't work!

______________________________________________________________

Life is pleasant, death is peaceful, its the transition that's painful!

______________________________________________________________

The other day a girl phoned me and said; "come over, there's nobody home." So I went over and there was nobody home.

______________________________________________________________

Giving power and money to the goverment is like giving an group of teenagers whisky and car keys.

______________________________________________________________

What will happen if a meteor hit earth? I tested this by using a sledge hammer and a frog, the results show that it'll be pretty bad.

______________________________________________________________

My wife made me join the bridge club. I jump off next tuesday.

______________________________________________________________

I've never forgot a face, but in your case it may be an exception!

______________________________________________________________

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

______________________________________________________________

If you don't like my driving then get off the pavement!

______________________________________________________________

Freind come and go but enimies accumulate.

______________________________________________________________

Love is blind. Freindship tries not to notice.

______________________________________________________________

The four most important words in a marriage are "I'll do the dishes."

______________________________________________________________

Do you want to speak to the person in charge? or the one that knows whats going on?

______________________________________________________________

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?

______________________________________________________________

If you haven't got anything nice to say about anyone, come sit next to me.

______________________________________________________________

The security of an object depends on who has it.

______________________________________________________________

Walking backwards is fun, for a while.

______________________________________________________________

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.

______________________________________________________________

Thinking is for the gloopy ones and the oomny ones use, like, inspiration and what Bog sends

______________________________________________________________

Black holes are where god divided by zero.

______________________________________________________________

Some cause happiness wherever they go, some whenever they go.

______________________________________________________________

Never interupt your enemy when he's making a mistake.

______________________________________________________________

Wise men don't need advice, fools don't take it.

______________________________________________________________

The only difference between genius and stupidity is that a genius has his limits.

______________________________________________________________

I have nothing to declare except for my genius!

______________________________________________________________

We're all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.

______________________________________________________________

Inspiration grows from the barrel of my gun.

______________________________________________________________

Praise the sun that brings the dawn of our final doom.

______________________________________________________________

Where there is rage, I shall show its course.

______________________________________________________________

Where there is shame, I shall point atonement.

______________________________________________________________

Where there is doubt, I shall sow faith.

______________________________________________________________

Where there is uncertainty, I shall bring light.

______________________________________________________________

War is my master, death is my mistress.

______________________________________________________________

(We take no responsibility for any burns,
poisoning, growth defects, radiation leaks, world hunger
or war)

______________________________________________________________

New! Essence of emerald!
Tried and tested by Jack Taylor.

______________________________________________________________

Jelly is not jelly without peanut butter.

______________________________________________________________

Our easy credit plan, 100% down payment and nothing
to pay each month!

______________________________________________________________

Instant credit given to anyone over 90
accompanied by both parents.

______________________________________________________________

'Beastiality' is not my site. I think.

______________________________________________________________

What makes a man is his little finger.

______________________________________________________________

Salesmen; lock your doors.

______________________________________________________________

London; a town on the edge.

______________________________________________________________

Hell; where the only dirty word is hope.

______________________________________________________________

Iraq; visit at your own risk.

______________________________________________________________

Life; where dreams are broken.

______________________________________________________________

Outside; Makes you wish you'd stayed at home.

______________________________________________________________

England; a great place to leave.

______________________________________________________________

New york; where your car is all our car.

______________________________________________________________

Earth; Where lunatics prosper.

______________________________________________________________

America; proudly fed a diet of fast food and cheap guns.

______________________________________________________________

Liberty city; a terrible place for a holiday.

______________________________________________________________

If education is a form of torture, I'm well educated.

______________________________________________________________

the chaos theory was dreampt up by a butterfly.

______________________________________________________________

Behind every man is a woman, and behind her is his wife.

______________________________________________________________

windscreen wash is not 'best used with condoms'

______________________________________________________________

I'm out of my mind, I'll be back in five Mins.

______________________________________________________________

solvents are my way of keeping happy.

______________________________________________________________

jeyes fluid is not a refreshing drink.

______________________________________________________________

If at first you don't succeed... destroy all evidence that you tried!

______________________________________________________________

All your problems, whether they be physical or mental, the miracle solution, just burn it!

______________________________________________________________

Is what politicians do on a Saturday night the same as what parrots do in heaven?

______________________________________________________________

The average man thinks he isn't.

______________________________________________________________

A cat born in an oven is not a cake.
______________________________________________________________

I don't want to be immortalised by my work, I want to be immortalised by not dying.

______________________________________________________________

Dyslexics untie!

______________________________________________________________

always remember, your unique. Just like everyone else

______________________________________________________________

For every complicated question, there is a simple, easy, and WRONG answer.

______________________________________________________________

mmm... tragedy, a hungry luma has appeared.

______________________________________________________________

The world is going to hell and I'm driving the bus!

______________________________________________________________

If barbie is so popular why do you have to buy her friends?

______________________________________________________________

harassing me about smoking may be hazardous to your health

______________________________________________________________

Never buy cheap tomatoes

______________________________________________________________

Time flies when your having fun, that's why school lasts so long...

______________________________________________________________

"A dog ate my homework" is no longer a valid excuse, but "My homework was involved in a car accident" is perfectly reasonable.

______________________________________________________________

Why buy world of warcraft when runescape is free?

______________________________________________________________

Family, religion, friendship, these are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.

______________________________________________________________

Normal eggs are the same as free range eggs exept they have chicken-poo on them!

______________________________________________________________

Mistaking electric cables for sugar-string sweets may result in shocking results.

______________________________________________________________

Make love, now war! After all, condoms are cheaper than guns!

______________________________________________________________

WARNING: Do not touch the rabid leprechauns! May result in SHORTIELOTIS disease!

______________________________________________________________

WARNING: LANDMINES - NO TAPDANCING!

______________________________________________________________

The toilet is not a alternative escape route.

_______________________________________________________________

Never do an emergency stop in you car when your holding a creme egg.

_______________________________________________________________

Go to bed with an itchy bum - wake up with a smelly finger.

Another day at school.... (¬_¬)

2008-06-17T12:45:00.000-07:00

Guess what happened today at school.... Miss Rock went absaloutly balistic at me for no reason, We were doing openings of our stories for english, She said AT LEAST a page, I'd done a page and a half and she went mental! I hadn't just turned the page so it looked like I'd done hardly any, she wasn't even joking! Jacob on the other side of the room didn't get told off as much as me and he'd done half a line! It just shows how 'dismissive' teachers can be, I hope it doesn't show up on my report.
'Ben doesn't do any work, he talks in lessons, messes around and is cheecky to teachers...' When infact what happened was: I'd finished the work, I was talking when she said we could if we'd finished, and when she shouts at me I JUST TRY TO TELL HER THAT I'D DONE THE GOD DAMN WORK!

"A brief history of stupidity" - by Ben, the creator of all

2008-06-17T11:35:00.000-07:00

Welcome - I've been waiting for your call - There is no need to be afraid.....
wait... c o m e b a c k....

Hello, my name is Ben and I am a ** year old kid, a very intelligent, nice child, and best of all I am really good at spelin. How do you spell that again? Oh, and if your a 30 year old and your looking at kids blogs..... please go.

Ben - The weird one.

Hey!

lol

Hi people!

Tip of the day!

Another day at school.... (¬_¬)

"A brief history of stupidity" - by Ben, the creator of all